Thursday, October 18, 2012

Request #2: Dialogue

As before this is a second request I received last week. I was asked to clarify what I meant by creating narrative that relied solely on the dialogue shedding light on the characters. If any of you are familiar with Orson Scott Card's Ender's Game, and it's introductory chapters, then you know what I am referring to. I just think that this is a very non-constrictive approach to narrative that really encourages the reader to visualize the actors in the dialogue. But anyways here's an illustration for you:

"Where's Geoffrey? He said he would be here soon..."

"Not sure... You want one?"

"Sorry. Don't Smoke. Jesus, I don't know how you can stand those things."


"The way they smell... like burnt ovens and ashtrays."

"You get used to it..."

"I remember what they called you in high school."

"Yeah? What did they call me?"

"It slips my mind... probably Thug."

"Sounds right."

"So, what do you think that we are supposed to be waiting for?"

"A package, or something. It's in the manifest. Right here... Somewhere..."

"And Geoffrey is supposed to bring it?"


"Then we kill him?"


"Bang. Bang. Like a limp fish."

"So how did you get involved in this racket?"'

"Blackmail. The Don has my kids. Said he's going to grind them down into paste if I don't do him a favor real quick."

"And you hope this qualifies as a Favor?"


"Do you think he has kids?"

"Who? Geoffrey?"


"Don't know... Where did that come from? Aren't you paid not to ask that?"

"Guy's got a conscience..."

"Out of sight, out of mind, I say."

"Out of sight. That's what they say."


"Don't let them out of your sight. First thing I learned."

"How sweet."

"Yeah... sweet. Shit... I'm out. You got 5 bucks?"

"For what?"

"I need another pack. They cost 4.76. I need enough for tax."

"Sure. Let me know if you see Geoffrey."

"Out of Sight..."


"Nothing. It's nothing...."

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